Hap

If but some vengeful god would call to me
From up the sky, and laugh: "Thou suffering thing,
Know that thy sorrow is my ecstasy,
That thy love's loss is my hate's profiting!"

Then would I bear it, clench myself, and die,
Steeled by the sense of ire unmerited;
Half-eased in that a Powerfuller than I
Had willed and meted me the tears I shed.

But not so. How arrives it joy lies slain,
And why unblooms the best hope ever sown?
Crass Casualty obstructs the sun and rain,
And dicing Time for gladness casts a moan. . . .
These purblind Doomsters had as readily strown
Blisses about my pilgrimage as pain.

~Thomas Hardy

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Cosmetics: De La Soul, Smoke Lips
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Exile, Aroha - Goldrush
Wings: ni.ju, Glow Dragon Wings - Cyber Web
Dress: Bare Rose, Arue Black
Shoes: G Field, Square-toes Shoes "Sophie" - white

Pose: Glitterati, 180

Location: Faery Dust
Light Settings: TOR, FOGGY - Sad Purple
Water Settings: TOR, Meridian verde

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Dwelling

I pray. I bring the bottle to my lips. I pour. I pray. I bring the bottle to my lips. I pour. I pray. I bring the bottle to my lips. I pour. I leave it in the hands of the gods.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Cosmetics: De La Soul, Faerie Pastel Lips
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Truth, Eden - golden
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Necklace: Axiom, Antithetical Concept Necklace
Dress: Evie's Closet, Fable Gown
Belt: De La Soul, Isle of Amras Healer's Belt - High Master
Shoes: G Field, Short Lace Boots - Blue

Pose: Dare, Whatever...

Location: Snuggles Forest
Light Settings: Places Las Legunas
Water Settings: TOR, You're In Luck

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Ro-chan's New Dolly

BDSM is a sometimes used but seemingly not often understood term in the world. Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, Masochism. While all these terms are encompassed in the term, those who fall under it's umbrella often embrace only a subset - sometimes very specific and particular. To be submissive is an odd thing; to enjoy the moment of being told what to do, of being outsmarted, of being knocked off balance and kept there but to know, at the same time as one teeters uncertainly, that one is safe. It can be sexual, but the urge to serve, to obey, to trust often extends far beyond sexuality.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Blush: Honey Kitty, cheeks 01
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: W&Y Hair, 168 - blond
Ears: Honey Kitty, Bunny hair Band
Flowers: Natural, Hana B
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Necklace: Axiom, Antithetical Concept Necklace
Shirt: Blue Blood, Piper - white
Dress: katat0nik, Le Cupcake Dress
Bloomers: Sn@tch, Bloomers - white
Gloves: Creative Kaoz Designs, Chantilly Lace - white
Purse: G Field, Heart Bag - pink
Stockings: Blue Sugar Stripes Socks
Shoes: katat0nik, Kita Mary Janes - candy

Pose: Glitterati, 043

Location: Legacies 1891 Dark Victorian Fantasy Roleplay
Light Settings: TOR, EUPHORIA Natural High

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Profile Deoridhe

There are new profiles on Second Life - semi-facebook style. Honestly, I find it mostly useless - though maybe I could link to my blog posts from there? - but I would love it if could get group notices through it, and maybe some way to mark if I've read the notice. I get so behind on my notices, and they clog up my inventory so much, that having a way to manage those easily would be nice. Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be an easy way to communicate with anyone in Second Life; to an extent it makes sense to keep out the hoi poloi, many of us who will have nothing useful to say, but it'd be nice to share a "wish list".


At some point, though, they changed the animation speed of the girls walk - or is it just in Firestorm? The duck walk was a result of speeding the animation up until then was ridiculous; now when I walk with my AO off it doesn't look good, but it doesn't look ridiculous either! I wish there was a more seamless way to work with poses for pictures and AOs, but right now I do a lot of turning on and off - made easier by the bottom button bar on Firestorm.


I have a card I give out to low-day avatars - a newbie notecard, if you will. I find I use it more when I go to some of the places at the destination guide. I also find that's where I run into people chatting to themselves in Voice through SL, or yelling at me to "go away" from a public place. It's a very odd thing, to place oneself in the path of strangers and see how they react. Questioning whether I should be friendlier, quieter, go closer or stay away. There isn't really an etiquette of how to deal with strangers in Second Life when you have your own tasks - it's rather like a small town, filled with strangers.


Lots of people have insecurities. Sometimes, the people I value most have major ones - like I do. There was an interesting TED by Brene Brown about people who have real happiness - the commonality for all of them is that they feel they deserve love. The need to be vulnerable, to leave oneself out to be hurt, being necessary for true happiness and connection with others is still an amazing challenge for myself.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Eyes: Adam n Eve, Frosted Forest
Eyeliner: cheLLe, Cleo Called Evergreen
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Illusory, Kimmi Streaked - Golden
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Necklace: Earthstones, Chocolate Box Necklace
Dress: katat0nik, Tall Dall Dress - green
Ring: Earthstones, Eternal Blossom Ring - Bouquet
Shoes: katat0nik, Kita Mary Janes - candy

Poses: Glitterati

Location: Garden of Dreams
Light Settings: EUPHORIA, Rotton melon
Water Settings: Listeryne

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Color Challenge: Week Forty - Apricot

Apricot week was rather difficult for me because most of my apricot was more orange or brown! I ended up settling on peach instead (it's a similar fruit!), swinging around to one of my favorite stores of all time, Blue Blood. A while ago, Ghanima started making whitegoth styled clothing as well as standard gothic clothing, and it's really been a wonderful way to extend my Classic and Sweet Lolita styling.


This dress also comes with a black checked vest and skirts to match, but I liked the paler color for this challenge. The delicate ribbing is very sweet and adds some texture to it. I paired it with G Field shoes; the square toe and simple band is meant to carry over the simplicity of the dress. The outfit was rounded out with a set of pearls from Wretched Dollies that I simply couldn't resist (someday I will return and buy them ALL!).

I went with simple cosmetics to match - eyes a combination of two Adam n Eve designs, a peachy blush that I thought suited, and a very dark lipstick from Rue. It's a little dark for Sweet Lolita, but then I'm not your average Sweet Lolita! The hair is a Hair Faire purchase from Raspberry Aristocrat, and they may be on my list as a new store to check out semi-regularly. I love the bits of hair flying loose, which makes the whole style look casual and natural.


I've really been grateful for my friends this week - complementing me, teasing me, listening to me whimper and complain, worrying about me, and giving me advice. When things are hardest in my life, they always seem to be there to cheer me up and make me feel like I'm a valuable person. It encourages me to take care of myself - something I'm not always the best at. Indulging myself, yes. Taking care of myself... not so much.


I don't know if all the exploring and picture taking counts as taking care of, though. it's definitely distracting. When I'm cursing shattered unicorn horns for being so hard to find, I'm distracted from the pains in my life. When I'm impatiently waiting for my auction spot to go, to see how much I'll make, I'm distracted from the pains of my life. when I'm trying on new clothes, or sorting my inventory, there isn't room in my mind to fret over the many things I could fret over.



( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Eyes: Adam n Eve, Winter Garden and Hepsut
Cheeks: Honey Kitty, X'mas Cheeks 3
Lips: Rue, Cold Kiss
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Raspberry Aristocrat, Jane Hair - Blond Honey
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings 
Necklace: Wretches Dollies, Pearls & Diamonds
Dress: Blue Blood, Piper - Peach
Shoes: G Field, Square-toe Shoes "Sophie" - white

Poses: Glitterati

Location: Enchanted
Light Settings: TOR, MIDDAY Why So Blue 1
Water Settings: TOR, Atomist

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Land of Smoke and Sacrifice

I'm currently addicted to a new series, the first one is called Thirteen Orphans, the second is Nine Gates, and it's a fascinating series based around the language and symbolism of mahjong. Part of what I find so charming about it is that not only are the female characters varied, interesting, and not stereotypical, but there are also multiple races represented despite the basis of the stories being ancient China.

The characters originate in a place called the Land of Smoke and Sacrifice - and going to this China sim made me think about that image, about the impermanence implied by brushed ink creating a world. The centrality of language for the Thirteen Orphans is also very familiar; words are central to my religious and spiritual life and their power weaves through the entirety of my experience. To find it reflected here, in such a beautiful and evocative manner, is really a pleasure.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Eyes: De La Soul, Charlie Makeup Faerie Pastel
Lips: Skinthesis, Liquid Heat - In Denial
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Illusory, Yew - Streaked Purple
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Dress: Falln Angel Creations, Melyna Dress Purple

Pose: Glitterati, 011

Location: China
Light Settings: Places Pathfinder

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Murder, LLC

This is a creepy and wonderful sim, and only around for a little while longer. Go and enjoy it while you can.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Eyes: De La Soul, Charlie Makeup Inked
Lips: De La Soul, Charlie MakeupRed Lips
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: dDx, Briannon - Ash Blonde
Wings: Favole, Fallen
Dress: SLC, Party Dress
Gloves: Eclectica, Swoon ebony
Stockings: Violent Seduction, Lingerie Masquarade
Boots: Favole, Wraith

Pose: Glitterati, 123

Location: Anna's Many Murders
Light Settings: Default Sim Settings

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

ptotally pterrific

I have to make a note about !Right, which has shown up in a few of my posts. I've been getting their blogger packs for a while, picking through and dragging out what I liked the most, and it's really been a pleasure! I'm new to this whole "People give you things and don't even expect anything" thing, but I have to admit it's taken me to stores and places I likely wouldn't have gone on my own. I don't like all of !Right's work, and it's off to one side of my style, but I've loved pushing the envelope into a new area of style.


It's been interesting watching the push and pull here and there about whether people should mention they're getting review copies or not. Some view it as bragging - which honestly surprised me since most of the store owners sending me things are not personal friends, but are rather acquaintances. Friendly acquaintances, but not close friends. Most of my close friends who are store owners, I sometimes blog but I purchase a lot of what I blog. One recent exception was the Gemini skin from De La Soul, but given how many of her Charlie skins I bought... I was grateful for the gifts! And I've picked up some additional cosmetic sets to add to what she gave me. Now and then something shiny will be dropped on me as a present, but more often than not I'm spending money.


There are some stores I get free things which I simply don't blog, too. I pick through for what I want - and some stores are closer to my personal style than others. I will admit to feeling some guilt about getting free stuff, though, and my general free-seeking behavior. It's hard economic times, and I'd like to spread my money around, but I'm trying to pick carefully where that money goes and how much goes out. Things are tight here, too. Really, at the end of the day, all I can offer is my gratitude for generous creators, and the equal positive feelings from those who enjoy my blog and pictures.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Tattoo: silentsparrow, Birdie Tattoos - cherry
Cosmetics: De La Soul, Red Lips
Eyeliner: cheLLe, Cleo Called Black
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Curious Kitties, Cindy
Wings: Terho, Elda - Red
Dress: !Right, Leona - black
Jewelry: Little Boy Blue, Clara Yule
Bracelets: Ezura, Lolita Crown - Red
Shoes: Purrfect 10, Summer Rose

Poses: Terho

Location: pteron
Light Settings: TOR, BIG SUN - Slips Through Walls 2
Water: TOR, Arakissed variant - tinted red

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Bewitched Beeswax

An important piece of information - outside of Second Life, I'm fat. Not chubby, not voluptuous, not big boned, not any of a thousand piddly terms for it. Fat. Comments claiming I am not, or giving diet advice, will be summarily deleted.

Today, at a meeting while I was working, a stranger shook my hand, introducing himself. He did that weird two handed shake, trapping my hand. He leaned in. He said, completely out of the blue and unsolicited, "Every woman should look like you. You're beautiful." It took me a few seconds to get my hand out of his; I left with my companion, pretty much saying nothing in response.

I found this man deeply creepy.

Part of it was the completely unsolicited and unwanted comment on my physical appearance. I don't often get that these days, and to be honest I prefer it that way. Good, bad, if we're not interacting on the level of dating I really don't care if looking at me makes your eyes bug out and your bile rise, or makes your libido inflate like a clown's poodle balloon - that's your business.

But the other part which deeply creeped me out was the implied insult toward all of the other women in the room - me being the largest. One of the nastier things used to pit women against woman is our worth publicly judged as appropriate eye candy (If you don't know what I mean, take a look at any tabloid in the grocery store. Ironically, one side effect of people realizing that Anorexia Nervosa fucking KILLS is that now women in the tabloids have about a ten pound window in which to be attractive - go above, you're a tubby fat ugly chick who shows celluloid in public (quelle horror!). Go below, and you're obviously a helpless, mentally ill child who needs to be tut tutted into eating two tubs of cottage cheese instead of one, maybe with some peaches.) One of the nastier aspects of the Big Beautiful Women movement, at least as expressed by some men and women, is a corresponding insult toward any woman who happens to be thin, slim, or even OMG skinny.

Fat, thin, I don't care. Weighing women's worth by their weight is the problem, not the number we summon when stepping on a scale.

Also, fsking creepy guy.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Cosmetics: De La Soul, Faerie Pastel Lips
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Wasabi Pills, Kiki Hair - Lemon Tea
Hair Decoration: Purangi Designs, Hair Lily - orange
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Dress: Nemesis, Monday Dress - beeswax
Necklace: Earthstones, Tree of Life - Autumn
Shoes: Deviant Designs, Beach Baby 2 - Sienna

Pose: Glitterati, JFTG Pose 1

Location: Bewitched
Light Settings: TOR, MIDDAY - Cheery
Water: TOR, Showing Age

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Forest Hunting

I had the most fun doing the quests in Chakryn Forest, which had been recommended to me in an earlier post. It's essentially an in-sim hunt, looking for shiny and sparkly things, and really the shiny and sparkly things are what you are hunting - if it glows, click it!! The prizes are really cute, and about the only frustration I had for the entire thing - for even hunting is a pleasure in a sim this beautiful - was the lag which seemed to grow now and then as I went.

I had a lot of fun staging and taking pictures as well, gradually adding my prizes as I went. The necklace is one of the things you get, and there are a couple of gifts hiding here and there, too. But really, in the course of enjoying yourself across the sim you're likely to find most of the hidden nooks and crannies, unearth the secrets, and make your offerings to the different characters in Chakryn Forest.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Kei Cream
Cosmetics: De La Soul, Faerie Pastel Lips
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Wasabi Pills, Kiki Hair - Rye
Hair Decoration: Split Pea, and with bees in her breath
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Shinies: Andrek, Chakryn Spirit Cluster
Dress: Purple Moon, Nine Gown in Black
Necklace: Andrek, Heart of the Forest
Shoes: G Field, Bow Strap Shoes "Kate" - black

Pose: Glitterati, 128

Location: Chakryn Forest
Light Settings: Magic Hour

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only