The History of Lovely

When I was around nine, I spent every other weekend in a gray apartment building. The only thing to do was go to the Seven Eleven on the corner; I'd often go with what money I could put my hands on and buy sweets - mostly sugar sweets or three musketeers. I can remember playing elaborate games with candy - separating, arranging, making stories. Between that and watching cable tv, my entertainment was limited.


When I was twenty, I was in a bad car wreck - one person not walking away bad. For the first time in my life, I felt the compulsion to cut - in the clinical, scar-leaving way. I can remember the fantasies, the sharp edges of the razor blades I had from art class, weighing the pros and cons. The pain was so bad, I needed a way to make it visible - to mark it on my skin for everyone to see.


A couple years after the accident, having taken First Aid and CPR, I was one of the first on sight a back car wreck. I held the hand of a woman who appeared to not speak English, or at least couldn't in that moment, and kept her calm until the EMTs came. She was bleeding, and I don't know how badly she was injured. After the accident, I drive straight to the Grocery Store and bought two bags worth of sweets - mostly chocolate. I've never felt that kind of compulsion before; I barely made it to my car before I stuffed a donut in my mouth.I compulsively ate maybe three, rapid fire without even tasting them, feeling a rush and sense of release... then didn't want them anymore, and most of the food ended up in the trash.


When I was twenty-three, I lost all my friends and my job went south, fast - stress and an inevitable feeling of failure. Being asked to lie. I dyed my hair blue and green in streaks, and when that didn't do it, I bought two cats.


Last year I started spinning out with stress - feeling hunted, cornered, overwhelmed. I bought some of my favorite foods, all of the guilt-inducing ones. I bought books. I curled up in bed, my cat now and then stalking across me or curling up nearby. I wrapped blankets over my bed, and ate, and munched, and after ten or eleven hours emerged substantially relaxed.


Today, I took the freedom of a person. I stood before insults, and kept my expression neutral as I was accused of all kinds of things. I took the simple, straightforward steps to making sure someone was in custody, and picked up the worry over the future attendant with that. On the way home, I stopped by the store. I bought some little, bite sized treats - things I could try and set aside if they didn't satisfy. I bought cheese and tomatoes and edamame. I put together a nice meal, tried some snacks, and tried to tell myself all the things people tell themselves in these situations. I cried.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Charlie Nude - Cream (with blond brows)
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: Red Mint, Hair No. 11 - Satin Blond
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Dress and Shoes: Ruru, Twinkle Dress

Location: Cute Poison
Light Settings: TOR, FOGGY - Catastrophe
Water Settings: TOR, Eyeballin'

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

The Mousetrap

I've been watching a new show, centered around numbers, and have been surprised at how much of it I know or learned as a teenager. Of course, it's very simplified; for all I know, my brother would twitch and complain about the simplification of complex mathematical concepts. It reminds me of how much we lie upon the complexity of numbers underpinning almost anything these days.

People are numbers. Avatars are numbers. Given this, I find the question of what is real and what is not even more difficult to understand. Add in identified and covert delusions, identified and covert hallucinations, the multiplicity of perspectives on single events...

One of the new thoughts about Autism is that rather than being an insensitivity to others and the surroundings, it's a different and oversensitivity. The issue with phrasing anything over and under sensitive, that presumes there is some optimal level of sensitivity that we all "should" have.

There are days I feel the pressures from without and the pressures from within as bullets against my skin.

Is that undersensitive.... or oversensitive... or just melodramatic.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Charlie Sparkle - Cream (with blond brows)
Eye Liner: cheLLe, Cleo Called Teal
Lips: Skinthesis, Liquid Heat Deoridhe
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Hair: W&Y, 168 Type B
Necklace: EarthStones,
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Dress: Falln Angel Creations, Deo Dress - Teal
Feet: Smalltime, Mouse Feets Bow Socks

Pose: Glitterati, 020

Location: The Looking Glass
Light Settings: TOR, EUPHOROA - Low saturation, dull deposit
Water Settings: TOR, Eyeballin'

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Bubblegum Weekend: Getting in Touch with my Feline Side

It can be a lot of fun to dress up in unusual clothing for once - kind of rave-ish and sparkly! I love the tattoo from Silent Sparrow. I don't often wear tattoos, but when I saw this I couldn't NOT buy it, and I think it fits gorgeously with this outfit a friend bought for me. I glow, but the creepy playground was perfect for setting off the outre rave outfit.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Charlie Rainbow Addict - Cream (with blond brows)
Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Tattoos: 1) K & L, Glow Tatoo (stars) 2) Silent Sparrow, Fledermaus Tattoos (rainbow)
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Hair: Curious Kitties, Nyanotech Hair
Clothing: K&L, Rainbow Nova Kitty

Pose: Glitterati, Dressed 8

Location: Sopor Aeternum
Light Settings: TOR, HORROR - Namob islet
Water Settings:

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Color Challenge: Week Thirty-seven - Lemon

With Lemon Week, I return to being able to find clothing named after the color of the week! That's a major achievement, yo!


Finding a place to settle was the hardest part - I ended up going to Locus, a place I'd been eyeing for a while. It's a gorgeous sim - I can't deny that - but the use of alpha made picture taking a little bit of a challenge! My wings are pure alpha, which means they tend to battle with alphas in the background, and since I don't do any post-processing there's no chance to fix it once the picture comes out of Second Life.


Pseudonyms, identity, and online behavior have been in my thoughts a lot recently. A lot of people maintain a difference between "real" and "fake" people - often characterizing the latter as cowardly or automatic trolls. Since early on in the internet, the claim that people could pretend to be other than what they were has been both a draw and a warning - the early comic of "On the Internet, no one knows you're a dog" always held the underlying insult toward appearance that "dog" implies.

But the Internet was never a bastion of be who you want - indeed, being white and male (and cis gender, and straight, and able bodied and minded) has long been considered the default. I can remember early on men taking an obviously female name and being shocked at the rapid and insulting response from others on the internet who saw obvious females as immediate prey. The website Fat, Ugly, or Slutty lists some examples of the experiences women have on the internet, and if you look only a little it won't take long to find similar experiences for anyone who deviates from the "norm".


On Second Life there are also norms which fall along gender lines - with an added bonus of assumptions about the "real" gender behind the avatar body as well as judgments on the avatar bodies themselves. A lot of the conversation is not over avatars in general, but rather over the bodies of female avatars - whether their presumed offline gender is male or female. Often the conversation extends beyond just the aesthetics of appearance to judgments about the woman (or man) beyond, though - including a not-so-recent post I made about the presumption that women who used the physics layer must have poor self esteem.

I've also been judged - as too childish, as too unattractive, and altering my appearance to appeal to men. I've judged other women - as too sexy, as badly proportioned, as cheap, as a prostitute or slut. We are raised to mention the appearance of girls and women first, to judge women by their appearance first, to use women's bodies and appearance as a shorthand for all sorts of social judgements.


There has to be a way to discuss aesthetics without descending into this trap, but right now I'm not sure how to.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Skin: De La Soul, Charlie Harlot - Cream (with blond brows)
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle Wings
Hair: Exile, Lady Versaille - Goldenrush
Dress: Cipher, Punk Lolita Mini-Dress - Lemon
Shoes: katat0nik, Kita Mary Jane Shoes - Candy Yellow

Poses: Glitterati

Location: Locus
Light Settings: TOR, MIDDAY - Coral Reef
Water Settings:

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Why I Won't Be Joining Google+

I've been a presence on the internet as Deoridhe since 2006. Before then I was briefly Aesdana, but Deoridhe has been a stable pseudonym for fifteen years - and I have the google footprint to prove it.

Deoridhe started on ISCABBS (anyone remember BBSes now?) and moved to several different MOOs, spent a long while on the various online journals, sent out feelers on Gaia Online (including a stint as a Moderator), and now runs two blogs as well as having a presence in Second Life.

Deoridhe has accounts on just about everything I've run across, even sites I don't use often. Offline friends know me through my gmail account, which I've had since the Google beta (I got an invite through someone on JournalFen, in FandomWank). Deoridhe predates Facebook by a long while, and when I signed up for Facebook it honestly never occurred to me to use anything other than my name - Deoridhe.

Deoridhe's last name is Grimsdottir (it was ones Faelis-Tiene; I have history as a Fluffy Pagan which you can find on the 'net if you look hard enough). I remember some people from Second Life being confused, since I'm Quandry on Second Life, but Deoridhe's last name has been Grimsdottir for a very long time - probably as long as ten years. When I legally changed my name, I put serious thought into adding "Deoridhe Grimsdottir" as more middle names. I'm called Deoridhe offline, or Deo, and I answer to it as easily as I answer to my other, offline name. I'm in several peoples' phones as Deoridhe, and once roleplayed out a character having "two" names to reflect my actual situation, where people get confused about what name to call me when we're face-to-face but I don't much care.

Google+, however, seems determined to make it clear that they want some sort of "regularly used identity" which is somehow different from an online pseudonym or nickname. That this is a stable nickname for me for over a decade, that I have significant history, that people call me Deoridhe offline, none of that matters - or maybe it does matter; Google+ seems determined to be unclear.

But I have two blogs through Deoridhe, and my email, and I don't want either to get caught up in Google+ if they decide Deoridhe isn't a good enough ID and suspend my account.

So no, I won't be signing up with Google+ until it's clear that being myself won't get my account suspended.

Credits:

My Avatar from Bronyville, inspired by My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Wings: Modified from Illusion
Chelle's Avatar Awesome, but I have no idea what it's made up of
Location: Imagine Isla
Textures: Fortunas

Some days so many things seem out of my reach.

Some days I get so tired of complaints, even my own.

( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Bronze
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie Harlot - Cream (with blond brows)
Eye Liner: Mock, Icon Eyeshadow
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Favole, Guardian
Crown: Favole, Prized
Hair: Sugarsmack, Bunni - Lemondrop
Necklace: Favole, Sacred
Dress: !Right, Dollie Dress - red
Watch: Iced, Heart Watch - Gold
Shoes: G Field, Knot Wedge Sandles - Gold

Pose: 2010.4 free

Location: Papermaki
Light Settings: TOR, DUSK - Sepia'ed
Water Settings: Valdez

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Bubblegum Weekend: Rainbow Love

I've never been particularly attached to having limited edition things.

Especially on a place like Second Life - my inventory is so voluminous that I've rarely seen something I own on someone else and I've never worn the same thing. If I did end up wearing the same thing, I think I'd be more inclined to want to pose together for a picture than get affronted like a fifties television character!

My drive to get a custom rainbow dress done was more about how difficult it is to get really well done, solid, bright rainbows. It's similarly difficult to get good orange and teal clothing, and some shades of green are particularly elusive, simply because people tend to stick to the big favorites - white, black, red, blue, pink. For someone like me, who really craves a variety of colors and well done fades, it can sometime seem like a sea of torment.


When I ordered this dress from Falln Angel Creations - and ordered is the right word - I specified rainbows and roses with sparkles. I think it more than fit the specifications - and beyond! All of the roses are actually color changing in a slow fade, which means there's a constant, slightly fading effect all over my body. The tulle of the skirt is a separate layer, which means when I move there's flashes of paler and darker colors. The wings were a complete surprise, and something I have dear Tomoyuki to thank for! I love how the colors of all the roses are staggered, too - so there's always a rose of each color at any given time even though they're constantly changing.

I paired it with the Rainbow Addict skin from De La Soul, though it matches up well with my Curio skin as well. I also took advantage of starting up with Phoenix's Firestorm viewer to layer Adam n Eve's Hapset eyeliner over it, and I think the effect is rather striking! I paired it with a brightly colored hair from Wasabi Pills for Bubblegum Weekend, a secondary challenge I'm trying to do where you wear an unusual shade of hair for a picture (or in my case a set!). I bought these at the hair faire after getting some samples from the creator - I love the bows over the ears!!!


I figured since there's a chance Viewer 1 may no longer work in August that I finally need to bite the bullet and move to a 2.~ based viewer. The multiple body layers is a wonderful side effect, and I'm looking forward to trying shadows and more naturalistic photography in the future as I settle into it. The one thing I miss - and this is a nitpick truly - is being able to easily move between windlight settings using the arrows one way and the other - I used that every time I took a picture, so without it I struggled. I also really missed the inventory screen coming up over notecards - having the notecards always float on top means I'm constantly moving things around my screen, since I tend to layer. I'm sure I'll get used to it, though!


I'm at the Arctic Greenhouse sim, which is actually a flower and plant store but is set up in a fascinating way! It's actually set within a snow globe, with little models of the snow globe set all over the sim in varying sizes! The concordance between the snowglobes was amazing, and I had a total ball watching the sun and earth rise over the rim and then fall again! I tried to get them in a few pictures - though I didn't pull off the sun, if you look closely you can see the earth in a few places. It also has some garden areas decorated with plants formt he store and little moving things, and as you can see, it's simply breathtaking.


( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Rainbow Addict (with blond brows)
Eye Liner: Adam n Eve, Hepsut
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Falln Angel Creations, Rose Vine Wings - color changing
Hair: Wasabi Pills, Mochi Hair - Aquatic
Dress: Falln Angel Creations, Deo Custom Gown
Stockings :R(S)W, Socks Brigh Rainbow Gradient
Shoes: G Field, Flower Pumps "Eve" - whiter

Poses: HelaMiyo

Location: Arctic Greenhouse
Light Settings: TOR, MIDDAY - Morally satisfied
Water Settings: Valdez

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only

Marked As Spam

On my Nothing to Do post I had a post marked as spam, which turned out to be a long defense by a male acquaintance of mine when I called him on his sexism. Amusingly, part of his defense is that sexism is worse for men - specifically him - because "I find myself constantly subjected to sexist comments and expectations, ie., stereotypes of me being, by sheer virtue of my virility, someone who is easily seduced, lustful, stupid, and who is expected to flatter women. Or, if none of these are seen in me, stereotypes begin to surface that qualifies me as a homosexual".

Nevermind that these are all ways in which a sexist society propagates itself - I'm just stunned at the pinwheeling of defensiveness even while having to underline "the sheer virtue of [his] virility"! And gods, someone might think he was GAY! How awful!

And of course, since he's a good liberal man, he could never possibly be sexist! Or homophobic! His objections to think he is lustful, stupid, or gay are completely liberal objections that certainly don't stem from assumptions about gender or sexuality - he's entirely pure minded and I'm just a horrible, strawmanning, emotional, woman - so what do I know? I've certainly never been at the receiving of so much sexism as someone assuming I was easily "easily seduced, lustful, stupid, and who is expected to flatter women". I've far easier just had to deal with assumptions that I was idiotic, over-emotional, crazy, ugly, and wanting offers of oral sex when I was twelve! So much better than his horrible life of being assumed to be "easily seduced, lustful, stupid, and who is expected to flatter women".

Flattering women.... RAPE would be better!

My favorite quote from below was how "I've spent a lot of time working promoting feminism and gender equality, so if you're going to call /me/ a bigot, you're being quite rash." His advocacy on behalf of women is clearly visibly in his response to my irrational, impassioned words by pointing out how much he SUFFERS from sexism at the hands of women.

Here is the conversation, in it's entirety (and no, this doesn't violate SLs TOS - you can't replicate in SL run places, but you can outside of that):

[2011/06/03 21:15] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Hello Deo.
[2011/06/03 21:15] Deoridhe Quandry: Hello!
[2011/06/03 21:15] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: What're you up to this evening?
[2011/06/03 21:16] Deoridhe Quandry: Hrm, managing my breedable pets, going through notecards, chatting with a friend... lots of stuff, really!
[2011/06/03 21:18] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Ah nice. I'm terribly bored, sitting here in Blarney Stone, listening to women confide the full extent of their self-esteem in their pixilated "physics." Tis a sad, uneventful night here indeed.
[2011/06/03 21:19] Deoridhe Quandry: o.O;; Huh?
[2011/06/03 21:19] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: You haven't seen the new "physics" add-on?
[2011/06/03 21:20] Deoridhe Quandry: I have, but I'm not sure... how women can tell about their self-esteem to a physics layer?
[2011/06/03 21:21] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Bouncing breasts, and its ability to lure half-witted sops, how else Deo! :-)
[2011/06/03 21:22] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: I've met some decent folk at Blarney.. But tonight it's all people like that.
[2011/06/03 21:22] Deoridhe Quandry: Yes, but that's your interpretation of why they use a phsyics layer, not them confiding in anything... and while one could confide in an inanimate object, others couldn't necessarily know about it.
[2011/06/03 21:23] Deoridhe Quandry: I mean, I had someone once tell me I dress up my avatar in different clothing because I was trying to attract men. That was is /interpretation/ of my clothing, as was the guy who said my clothing meant he didn't want to talk to me at all because my clothing made me non-sexual.
[2011/06/03 21:24] Deoridhe Quandry: As far as I'm concerned, both men interpreted my presentation to their own ends. Neither were accurate.
[2011/06/03 21:25] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: No no, trust me, these women were bragging and boasting about themselves with a clear love of the affection showered on them by desperate men. I completely understand people dressing up nicely for themselves.
[2011/06/03 21:25] Deoridhe Quandry: That doesn't necessarily relate to self-esteem, though, much less the entirity thereof.
[2011/06/03 21:26] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Hahaha, it's an caricaturization Deo ;-)
[2011/06/03 21:26] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: a*
[2011/06/03 21:26] Deoridhe Quandry: Oh, so you're being prejudiced against them because they're in female avatars and boast about attracting men. 8/
[2011/06/03 21:27] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: More because I see things like this:
[2011/06/03 21:28] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: [21:08] [Name Redacted 1]: doesn't [Name Redacted 3] have nice boobs?[21:08] [Name Redacted 2]: i can see them bounce
[21:08] [Name Redacted 3]: l never see them bounce
[2011/06/03 21:29] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: (lots more for me to filter out, but that's the jist :-P)
[2011/06/03 21:29] Deoridhe Quandry: So they're.... admiring each other positively and that means... theyr self-esteem is based on attracting men through avatar physics. That's a gross mischarictorization.
[2011/06/03 21:30] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Deo, with /these/ women, what I've seen, it usually is. You should spend some time at the Blarney and just listening to what people talk about.
[2011/06/03 21:31] Deoridhe Quandry: I get you odn't like the women. I'll remember to never talk to you about personal stuff in case I might be one of /those/ women.
[2011/06/03 21:34] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Not because they're /women/, Deo. It's because they're a certain type that I don't particularly favour. And you're not one of those kinds, Deo.
[2011/06/03 21:39] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: But, I know, my caricatures aren't for everyone. They're biting and satirical, harsh and burdensome. Would you really expect anything less from a pious Nietzschean? :-)
[2011/06/03 21:40] Deoridhe Quandry: I would expect better than hackneyed and thoutless sexism from any philosopher.
[2011/06/03 21:41] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Sexism?
[2011/06/03 21:42] Deoridhe Quandry: Yes. Your interpretation of women admiring each other being FOR MEN and ABOUT MEN, as well as your charitcorizaiton of admiration between them as being the sum total of their self-esteem is so cloyingly and idiotically sexist that it makes me feel physically ill.\
[2011/06/03 21:43] Deoridhe Quandry: And that you thought it appropriate to express it to me, another owmen, with the sickening conceit that I am somehow different because you know more sides of me than you do of them, as if I would find it a complement to have you insult my gender ot me, also makes me ill.
[2011/06/03 21:44] Deoridhe Quandry: I know you can expect this kind of things from a lot of men, but I really expected better than you, and I'm disappointed ot be wrong.
[2011/06/03 21:45] Deoridhe Quandry: On that note, I have avatar physics, my breast bounce, and other women have admired them. Now I'm one of THOSE women.
[2011/06/03 21:45] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Well, I'm surprised you're blowing this out of proportion. Gender relations has a tremendous impact on people's choice of fashion and what they choose to pride themselves in.
[2011/06/03 21:46] Deoridhe Quandry: Oh great, minimization right out of the gate. That's the beginning of sexism bingo. Have a good day, I won't speak to you further. If you think I'm "blowing it out of preportion" then kindly go away.
[2011/06/03 21:46] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Sure, they can bounce. I never said that in and of itself was indicative of wanting to impress anyone. I said for these specific women, who sit around bragging all day about their affairs in the Blarney, that caricaturization is accurate.
[2011/06/03 21:47] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Chuckles... Deo, you're not being rational, and you're not reading what I'm /actually/ saying.
[2011/06/03 21:47] Deoridhe Quandry: 1) calling me irration. Second bigo square. FUCK OFF.
[2011/06/03 21:48] Incoming message from ([Childish, Sexist Asshole])
[2011/06/03 21:48] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: You're /not/ being rational.
[2011/06/03 21:48] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Read what I'm /actually saying/.
[2011/06/03 21:48] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Do you sit around in bars bragging about affairs? No.
[2011/06/03 21:49] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Did I say that having physics automatically implies low self-esteem for wanting to impress members of the opposite sex? No. You're /not/ reading what I'm saying.
[2011/06/03 21:49] Incoming message from ([Childish, Sexist Asshole])
[2011/06/03 21:50] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: /And/ you're allowing your emotions, and traditional strawmanning male chauvinism, to cloud your reading. I've spent a lot of time working promoting feminism and gender equality, so if you're going to call /me/ a bigot, you're being quite rash.
[2011/06/03 21:58] Incoming message from ([Childish, Sexist Asshole])
[2011/06/03 21:59] [Childish, Sexist Asshole]: Unless if, of course, you are a person who does sit around taverns bragging about their affairs, then you have no reason to be offended. (I also censure men who do the same thing) But I know you're not that kind of a person.

Final note: One thing that struck me re-reading this was how the person characterizing men as unintelligent and easily seduce was him. It's not an opinion I've ever had, nor one I expressed. I just expressed dismay at the idea that one could tell the self-esteem of female-bodied avatars (who may or may not be offline women) by their conversation about breast physics, and then described this as sexism - which honestly it is. We ascribe women's self-esteem to their bodies because women are primarily judged by their bodies and praised for their bodies. The commentary on the appearance of the Secretaries of State since they became women, and compared with similar lack of commentary when those Secretaries were men, shows this pervades at the highest level when appearance is less than important to what the women are doing.

This follows through on female shaped and presenting avatars even when we can't know the genders of the people behind the avatars. Primarily what I objected to, though, was that the characterization of "women confide the full extent of their self-esteem in their pixilated 'physics.'" and the subsequent defense of this as both accurate and useful as a topic of conversation. I am a woman. I have an appearance. I have a history of judging other women based on their appearance because it's what I was raised to do. It is only recently that I've realized how pernicious, and how sexist my own actions were - steeped in an assumption that female-presenting bodies exist for me to look at them in a way I do not assume for men.

Yes, I just said I made these sexist assumptions - because even being raised a feminist, and even being female and subject to a lifetime of sexist behavior, does not stop me from buying into and expressing sexist behavior.

(Edited to add - A month or so after Redacted 1 (I think) requested I redact her name, [Childish, Sexist Asshole] requested the same - though not entirely politely. I complied anyway, after blocking him. This one's for you, [Childish, Sexist Asshole]!)

Rainbow!!!!!

I have never gotten a custom dress before - it really wasn't on my radar - but more and more as the suggestion was wagged in front of me I dreamed of... what would MY dress look like?


We have an answer.

( More pictures here. )

This gorgeous dress is from Falln Angel Creations and I love it. The hair is Wasabi Pills.

Color Challenge: Week Thirty-six - Celadon

Celadon Week totally threw me. It's a color I've never heard of, and I know a lot of colors! I ended up matching by eye instead of name, and ended up with a limited edition Schadenfreude corset, from their rainy day event, and paired it up with the Deviance fairy outfit that I've had in my inventory for a long time, now. I think I matched the swatch pretty closely, even if none of the names match!


I have to give a quick shout-out to Honor's Post Menopausal Blog, where I get a lot of my locations these days. She directed me to DDLE2 (yes, it's an odd name for a sim!) where I explored around finding different places to take pictures. I got foiled partway through by some vividly green ground which totally threw off the composition of my pictures, and a general problem with areas being too uniform - which makes for not terribly interesting backgrounds - but I think the end results were worth flying all over the sim! Other blogs which cover new locations in Second Life are invaluable for my picture taking. I can't stress enough how difficult it is to find new and interesting places, even though Second Life is full of them! I'll also sometimes hit the Destination Guide, but by and large I go by finds from other bloggers.


Now to get into me!

The hair is new from the Hair Faire, a Calico Ingmann Creations new style. I've been buying her hair for a long time (I recently found all the odd colors in her Seelie hairstyle in my new folder - been there a while!) and she just seems to get better. Better accessories, better textures, even better ways of working themselves - now her sets come color changing using huds, so you only have one "blond" hair in your inventory but you can change not only the shades of blond, but also add streaks to it! I was totally blown away. The accessories are also changeable through a hud, which is amazing; I did a fun combo here using the greener tones but there's a wide variety to match them with tons of outfits!

The corset is, as I said above, from Schadenfreude. I'm not sure this hue is still available, but I know there are other Schadenfreude corsets you can buy. I was surprised at how easily this fit with my poses, though, especially given how often corsets and poses mix badly. Even with the bending poses this worked well, though I was aided by the skirt covering up the bottom edge of the corset - which smooths over some flaws in the avatar mesh. I ended up doing some editing to the corset itself to fit my shorter, wider shape, but since the main part of the corset was a single prim this was really, really easy.


The outfit is from Deviance and I adore it! I have this in every possible color, which was a huge money sink but I've been able to use it in so many combined outfits, and in of itself it's charming. I even have a bunch of color combination ones, so I've really gotten my money's worth with it. It almost seems like it's meant to be worn with a corset; the texturing of the torso was corset-like, but I think the narrowness of the waist Schadenfreude gave me really highlights the level of skill in the flower detailing of the skirt and bodice. The primwork combines wonderfully with the texturing, making this look almost real. I particularly like the semi-transparent prims over the bodice, which really add a magical quality.

This kind of challenge really makes the color challenge worth it - I don't think I ever would have combined these items without the push of trying to match an unusual color. I've been thinking about what other kind of challenge might be fun; briefly I took part in a pose-object challenge, but it was simply too difficult to find things without buying, and being able to not buy new things every week is central to my ability to keep up with this challenge. Perhaps an accessory contest might be fun, though; I have immense accessory depths, so it might be fun to plum into them and see what I can find.


( More pictures here. )

Credits:

Eyes: De La Soul, RooMee Eyes - Rainbow
Skin: De La Soul, Charlie - Sparkle
Ears: Illusion, Mystic Ear
Wings: Fancy Fairy, Azarelle
Hair: Calico Ingmann Creations, Isis 2 (w/flowers)
Dress: Deviance, Supar Plum Fairy - mint
Corset: Schadenfreude, Mint Julep Corset
Shoes: G Field, Flower Pumps "Eve" - cream

Poses: Glitterati

Location: DDLE2
Light Settings: TOR, Midday - Herr Gracken
Water Settings: Valdez

Photographed by Deoridhe Quandry
Post processing: Cropping only